Learning From My Old Self

I was doing some Googling about BQs and somehow came across a gem of a blog post I wrote in August 2012 where I stated my goal to qualify for Boston.

It’s funny because I write this blog and put my life out there on the internet and sometimes forget how much information about me is available. And how even though it seems to me like I know what I’m talking about at the time, I could be totally wrong and not know it yet. It’s kind of like when you come home from college and find your high school diary and read it. You cringe a little thinking of your nativity and think to yourself that you have grown so much since then. Such did I when reading this particular passage:

So, [Boston Qualifying] attempt #1 will be Surf City. I plan to register for at least 1-2 more marathons in the Spring. Which marathons will depend on which one Asia wants to do, since I told her that I would run one with her since she will miss Surf City. I have a feeling the 3rd race may be the San Diego Rock n Roll Marathon. I kind of want to run this race even if I’ve already BQed, even if it’s just for fun. It might be fun to dress up and run it!

No Nicole – you can’t just run 3 marathons in 6 months and even if you dress up, it still won’t make the pain any less. And thinking you can BQ in February and then pace someone to a BQ just a few months later is probably not realistic. But, you need to learn that first hand.

At least I did have some foresight here:

I’ve also come to the realization that I may not qualify for Boston at all before the 2014 race deadline (September of 2013). I’ve stalked many a blog of good runners who took several attempts to qualify. So far in my short racing career I’ve been pretty lucky when it comes to having good race days (I guess with the exception of the recent hot and humid AFC). I’ve never had a nutritional disaster or a “bad day.” I tend to run my races at a steady pace for nearly the whole time. But I’m probably due for a bad day at some point so I’m also acknowledging that something out of my control could set me back from my goal as well.

I’ve come a long way since August 2012 and I certainly respect the marathon a distance quite a bit more than I did then. Although I did cringe a little reading my old post, it also helped me even learn more about myself as a runner and as an athlete. It’s a good reminder that no matter how much we think we know, there is so much more to learn. In all honesty, getting that BQ at Surf City as planned wouldn’t have meant what it will mean when I get it now. Although it certainly would have been easier, I’ve learned a whole lot in the meantime.

Ironically I was dead on with this closing statement:

It’s going to be a long road but I know if I set my mind to it, this BQ will be mine!

The truth is, no matter how old we get, we’ll always look back on our former selves and laugh a bit at where we were. But that’s the beauty of life – we’re always changing, learning, adapting and growing.

Have you ever read your old training logs, journal or blog posts and laughed at yourself and/or learned something about yourself?