California International Marathon 2025 Race Recap: A New Era

When I signed up for CIM in June, I was determined to race on a fast course to BQ/PR.

However, things changed.

After years of chasing a time goal in the marathon, I ran the California International Marathon without one. Instead, my goal shifted to finishing on my 2 feet this time (I collapsed in 2014) – letting go of my old pre-kids running self and celebrating the runner I am TODAY.

But that doesn’t mean I didn’t have goals – I did – they were “action goals” meant to keep me focused on the process, not the outcome.

You can read all about my training for CIM in this blog recap – it was a great training cycle, which started with the intention of chasing another BQ and ended up with the goal of celebrating my fitness and working on my mindset around running.

This year has been a stressful year. Outside of the years when I went from child-free to 3 children in 3 years, it was one of the most emotionally turbulent year I’ve had in 15+ years. This is for some reasons I can speak openly about, and for others that will remain private. In the final months of this training cycle, and particularly in the final 2 weeks, while running remained important to me, other matters were more urgent and important and took my mental and physical energy.

The pivot to effort based goals and training wasn’t due to ONE thing – it was the combination of quite a few things that led me to putting too much pressure on my training and tune up races (PB half) – ultimately realizing that I was losing the “point” of running – to have fun.

After so many years of pushing and comparing myself to all my pre-kids PRs, the race became symbolic of letting go of that old self and focusing on where I am today.

Travel to Sacramento For CIM

I live in San Diego, so Sacramento is a short flight. My husband came with me – which is a first since NYC 10 years ago. He went to college at UC Davis and still has friends in the Sacramento area, so it doubled for him as a way to support me and a chance to see his friends (But Mike made it clear supporting me was his number on intention – I’m lucky to have him!).

On Friday we went to the expo and then checked into our AirBnb which was about a mile north east of the finish line. Since I signed up 1 day before complete sell out, all the host hotels were totally booked and all the other hotels in the downtown area were very pricey. In retrospect, I should have just booked a hotel farther from the city center since we actually didn’t end up walking anywhere and had a rental car.

But, I thought an AirBnB would be nice for cooking dinner the night before and being able to lounge around watching Stranger Things. It was in that sense – but without going into a lot of details – the AirBnB itself had quite a few less than optimal features and the neighborhood didn’t feel very safe.

The expo was small – CIM has only 10,000 runners – and it seemed to me that everyone there looked very fit and serious. I got to see a long time Instagram friend and we watched the beginning of a talk with Steph Bruce and Lindsay Hein which was pretty cool! After the expo we went to Thai food for dinner.

Saturday morning Mike insisted we leave the area for my shake out run so he dropped me off at UC Davis where I was able to run a beautiful path on their campus. I felt INCREDIBLE during my shake out run. My legs felt light, I felt positive and excited. I didn’t feel nervous – but I felt more curious about what tomorrow might bring. With no BQ goal putting pressure on a sub 3:35, I wondered where my fitness might bring me.

After the run we met up with Mikes best friend and his family for a massive waffle and coffee and then went back to the AirBnB to binge Stranger Things, eat even more carbs and get ready for the race.

Feeling Good Carb Loading for a Marathon

I think this was my BEST carb load yet – digestion was great, I didn’t feel crappy and overall the food choices I made were higher quality. I started on Thursday and ramped it up through Saturday. Admittedly, I did not actually track the grams of carbs but I did some rough math with a goal of 500-550g/day.

If you’re curious what my carb load looked like & some tips for carb loading before a marathon, check out this YouTube video I made on the carb load.I also think the fact that I ate so many carbs in training helped me feel better in the carb load.

Setting Action Goals for the Marathon Instead of Time Goals

For the last 2 months of training, my coach had me train based on perceived effort (RPE) instead of giving me paces for my workouts and long runs. Mentally, this allowed me to take circumstances that would typically throw me off in the past – like wind, hills, heat, cold, a bad nights sleep, etc and work through them instead of getting discouraged when I couldn;t hit paces.

Although my coach never told me what she thought I was capable of for this race (I asked her not to), I sensed it was in the 3:3X range. And honestly, I think if I was mentally ready for that I could do it. But this race wasn’t about that.

On our pre-race call, we made a race plan based on action goals and effort, not paces. I go the idea of action goals from the book “Courage over Confidence” which I highly recommend if you struggle with mindset side of racing.

Here were some of the action goals:

Action Goal: Start conservatively and warm up, 5/10 effort.
Action Goal: Drink my bottle of tailwind by mile 5, take a gel every 30 minutes.
Action Goal: Set mini-focus goals for miles 13-20, the miles I typically struggle most mentally- these included things like “smile” “pick my favorite sign” “gratitude mile” ” focus on running form” and recalling really solid training runs like the tempo I did around the reservoir in Central Park in NYC.
Action Goal: Stay mentally engaged and positive, even when obstacles

By shifting to action goals – aka things I can CONTROL – the things that happen TO me in the race are far less stressful. The same thing happened in training – when it was windy, or hilly, or i didn’t feel great, I stayed engaged through the workout, knowing that I could control my actions, and pace was secondary.

CIM Race Report

I slept poorly both nights at the AirBnb (combo of the bed and wall heater clicking on and off, and nerves I suppose). Again, I absolutely NAILED my pre-race fueling and ate the most carbs I’ve ever had before a race.

What I Ate Before the Marathon

I woke up at 3:45 AM, which was 3 hours 15 min before the race. Normally, I wake up just 1 hour before my long runs – so I knew I’d be able to consume more carbs before. However, I ended up eating more than I even expected since I got in half at the AirBnB and the other half on the long bus ride.

(these details are as much for me to refer back to as for you to read, so bear with the details- I asked chatGPT to add it up for me):

Here are the estimated carbs for each item (typical nutrition values):

• Dave’s Killer Bagel: ~48 g (split between half when I woke up, 1/2 on bus)

• 1 scoop Tailwind: 25 g (sipped on bus)

• 1 cup orange juice: 26 g (right when I woke up)

• 1 medium banana: 27 g (when I woke up)

• 1 tbsp peanut butter: 3 g (On bagel)

• 1 tsp honey: 6 g (on bagel)

• 1 Huma gel: 21 g (20 min before the start)

Total ≈ 156 grams of carbs (800ish calories)

I made a friend in line for the bus and we ended up chatting for the entire bus ride and then spending the entire morning together – waiting in line for the bathrooms, then going back to the bus to stay warm, then going back to pee one last time. It helped make the morning fly by and ease nerves.

It was ideal running weather – low 40s – which meant it was cold at the start. My friend Kelley gave me her NYC marathon poncho, so I wore that as well as a pair of joggers that had a hole in them and a zip up hoodie I was willing to part with. I slowly got rid of my gear but ended up starting the race still wearing the zip up hoodie.

I lined up around the 3:45 pace group thinking that would be a conservative start. I was a little nervous but mostly calm and ready to go.

When I started running, I didn’t have that same pop I had during my shake out run- but I knew my legs were cold and I had absolutely no warm up. My intention was to not look at my watch much during the race and to keep the effort at 5/10 for the first 5-6 miles. And that’s what I did.

Although I thought the 3:45 would be conservative, it felt like the entire race was passing me for the first 2-3 miles as I stuck to my 5-6 effort. I knew that most people go out too fast at CIM and it will come back to haunt them later, so I didn’t worry. I was focused on MY race. I kept reminding myself “you’re warming up” and just tried to soak it in. I was not listening to music yet. I had 1 scoop of Tailwind in a small handheld bottle and was sipping on that to start.

The first 8 miles were incredibly consistent, averaging 8:42 pace. This section averages 35 ft of gain per mile and 52 of gain, so a very modest decline overall. I saw Mike somewhere around mile 6ish and handed him my water bottle – I’d drank the tailwind and taken the 2 gels already.

However, at mile 9, I had to use the bathroom. I have to stop on EVERY long run, so I wasn’t surprised (and I also stopped at both my BQ marathons) . I saw a group of portopotties and planned. make a quick stop, but as soon as I stopped I realized that ALL were occupied and there was one person waiting.

Once I got in there, I also realized, just as I thought, I started my period. Luckily I brought a tampon with me. The entire trip took about 2 minutes and that mile was 10:47. I thought of my coach when I went over the 15K timing mat, thinking she would think I was struggling (which she did), but I was very calm- I knew this likely would happen and I kept going.

After the bathroom, I actually felt really good! The crowds were starting to pick up and I remember high fiving kids and smiling a lot through some of those sections. I put my headphones in and started listening to music. This was probably the best I felt in the first part of the race. I saw Mike and I told him I felt good.

Miles 10-13 were back at 8:45 average, and these are some of the hillier miles. I was staying with my 5/10 effort. And despite feeling a bit better, honestly, I had no real motivation to go faster. Without the time goal, I just didn’t have a drive to push. And I knew I still had a long way to go, and there was time to push later. I was thinking about some of my strong long runs – 21 miles or 22 miles with 8-10 miles of pace work – and that I could negative split and pick it up on the back end.

My coach told me that there weren’t any big hills past mile 14, but the course continued to roll. Nothing crazy, but you really don’t feel any decline. Miles 14-18 are always the hardest mentally so I started going through my action goals – picking my favorite sign, smiling, thinking about my form, etc. I high fived kids and laughed at signs. But again, I had no desire to push it harder. I was cruising. Around mile 16 I saw Mike, and I was less enthusiastic than before.

Around this point, two things happened – my headphones died (apparently I need new ones because they were fully charged). And the 3:55 pace group came up behind me. Spectators kept saying “Go 3:55” over and over when we approached, which at first really annoyed me. I didn’t want to run with them. I wanted to be ahead of them. That provided brief motivation to go faster. I had averaged 9:01 pace (I was not looking at my watch though so I didn’t know this) for miles 13-18.

At mile 18, I got a renewed sense of excitement and motivation for the race and started to run faster. Without my headphones, I was more engaged with the runners around me and the spectators and music on the course. One of my favorite signs was “In case you forgot, you’re amazing.” Yes, I am amazing – even if I’m not running a PR, even if Im’ not BQ’ing, I’m running a freaking marathon and I feel good!

I smiled SO MUCH! I thanked people. I was so happy. I can honestly say that this is the first race where I got HAPPIER as the race went on. When I got to 18 I thought “Only 8 miles left!” I planned to pick it up and really run the last 4 miles (which is a flat section) hard, like a workout. I imagined myself flying by people, and absolutely sprinting into the finish. Miles 18-22 averaged 8:54 pace. I was proud of myself for not falling off and maintaining a consistent pace throughout.

However, once we crossed over the bridge and starting the final 4 mile straightaway toward the downtown finish, my gait on my left side started to hitch every 10ish strides. It would come out of no where and my foot would kind of rotate and I’d feel unsteady, like maybe I’d fall. I had to slow down, and finally the 3:55 pace group passed me.

But, I stayed calm. I couldn’t run faster like I thought I would (breathing was fine), but I would still finish without walking. I kept enjoying the race – smiling and celebrating. A few people called my name in the final miles and I was so thankful to have people cheering for me. And for the first time in a marathon, even though I got slower, I got happier ( I still averaged 9:16 pace, so didn’t slow too much!)

I was on the verge of tears at one point, being so thankful that I was going to finish on my own two feet, and proud myself for doing it. In past races, I’ve cried tears of pity and disappointment in final miles as I knew the BQ wasn’t going to happen again. But today, I was SO GRATEFUL and I was having so much fun.

When I collapsed in 2014, the finish line was a left turn and then another left. This year, the finish line was a left, and then a right. When I made the first left, I started running faster. And I turned my head to my left and saw the place I had collapsed before. I said a mental goodbye, then turned my attention to the right, to the finish.

I threw my hands up in the air and smiled ear to ear. I had tears in my eyes and enjoyed the moment fully. I knew Mike was watching somewhere and that he wouldn’t have to come down on the course help me cross the finish line this time.

After I crossed the finish line, I kept smiling. I didn’t even look up my finish time until after I looked up Kristen, one of the athletes I coach’s finish time. She was right behind me, running a 4:01 in her first marathon! When I later found out I ran 3:56, it really didn’t mean much to me. I waited for Kristen and congratulated her and met her family and then I found Mike ,who was with his college friend heather and her family (we do a trip with Heather their larger group of friends every few years and she’s my friend too!) .

Biggest sign of fitness: I’ve never felt so good AFTER a race. We took photos, celebrated and I easily walked a mile to the car. We flew home that day and I didn’t feel super tired or sore. Mike and I showered and went to a brewery to celebrate on the way to the airport. The next day, I didn’t need the railing to walk down stairs.

Did I have pants of regret for not pushing harder? I’ll be honest – a little. Seeing other runners hit BQs, PRs and race hard did make me long for that. But, this race wasn’t about that. What that longing did show me was that I’m not ready to give up time goals yet (and obviously I need one in order to race hard).

I know there are still things I need to work on – why do I hold back so much? Why do my legs feel heavy at the start of pretty much every race when they don’t feel like that in training (pretty sure at this point its psychological). I need to work on my speed at shorter distances in order to race a marathon faster (or maybe I just mentally need this)

But the wins: I stayed mentally strong, I finished on my own 2 feet, I took every challenge and overcame it, I fueled like a champion (1 tailwind, 7 gels), my endurance is excellent, my legs are strong. And I ran my 12th marathon!!!